In My Dreams, Part I

As an Ajatar, Kikuriku had a strong connection to the shadows. The darkness was where he lived, where he slept and where he knew he would die. It didn’t bother him though, because the darkness was his closest friend. Ever since Na’il was killed, Kiku preferred to keep to himself – so naturally, the shadows was where he felt most at home.

As he grew older, however, his relationship with the shadows changed. Where once he found solace in their embrace, now he grew afraid of their presence. Being alone with the shadows granted him a clarity of thought that he was not prepared for – for when he was alone with his thoughts, Kiku was terrified. Deep within his soul, there was a darkness that threatened to swallow him whole. A constant battle between the light of Kiku’s mind… and the dark.

The worst of it occurred when Kiku slept. Whenever he closed his eyes to rest, there was the internal battle for dominance. Whatever was inside of him, it wanted out, and it wanted to be free.

But like most mortals, Kiku needed sleep. He needed to recover, and he so loved laying in a bed. He enjoyed the adventures that dreaming would bring, whether they were dalliances with women in secret or swashbuckling the high seas. Most nights, however… Kiku would dream of his mother.

He usually dreamed of the regular life that he always wanted with her – she’d stay at home and keep the house clean, Kiku would go out and make the money. Sometimes, his father was there – what little of him that Kiku remembered anyway. He was usually reading an issue of the Tablet, his face constantly obscured. No matter how often he tried, Kiku could never get his father to put the paper down and join him outside. He tried not to think about it, but he always wanted to spend a little more time with his father – even if it was in a dream.

Every dream that Kiku could remember would take place at night. Something was different about this night, though – it wasn’t so much that it was dark because it was late… it was dark because that’s how the world was. Dark, cold and unfeeling. There was a constant depressing feeling, even when Kiku was happy and with his family. This feeling permeated his entire world – like something was watching him.

He found himself on a landing floating high in the air with nothing around him but stars and clouds. Despite knowing it was a dream, Kiku’s heard pounded frantically in his chest, crying desperately in fear. Danger was near. The floor began to crack beneath his feet. Below, a large, faceless demon waited with an open mouth to swallow him whole. Everything was shaking – the floor began to fall. There was nowhere to go but down. Down into the mouth of the demon. But the demon looked familiar. The demon was…